I absolutely hate my iPhone...because I absolutely love my iPhone.  When the phone first came on the scene I got one.  I had that phone until the 4 came out.  I still have my 4, not a 4s, but a 4.  When this phone dies I will probably get a 5 or the newest version.  I have never had a tool that was so seamless at phone calls, email, internet, camera, text messaging, note taking...basically everything.  I love my iPhone.

And I HATE my iPhone.  My boys tell me that Hate is a bad word, so for them I'll say I really dislike my iPhone.  I don't hate it because it doesn't work.  I hate it because of who I have become since having it.  I lack discipline with my phone.  While I'm at work it is never not with me.  When I am home it only leaves my sight as my eyes close at night.  At home I am constantly checking email, receiving and responding to text message, or playing some kind of game, checking twitter, or Facebook. I'm addicted.  My wife tried at first alerting me to the problem and now there are deep sighs and eye rolls, but I don't hear it or see it because I'm too busy laughing at the latest status or checking in on how bad the Astros are losing.

I know what I need to do.  No...I'm not going to throw it away.  At least not yet.  I have to show some discipline.  If I throw it away, then I haven't focused on the root issue.  I'm just dealing with the surface issue.  The root issue is that through the use of my phone I have disengaged with people, especially my family.  Even one of my elders said not too long ago as we were talking at his store, that I'm constantly looking at my phone.  People probably know what the top of my head looks like better than what my face may look like.  One question to all of you, "Do I have a bald spot?"  I need some time without my phone or other gadgets.  So I've made a decision.  I've decided that my phone will be put away at 5pm each night.  Basically, when I'm home with my family, my time becomes theirs and not a million other peoples.  This will not be easy, but it is totally necessary.  So, when you see me or text me (before 5pm) ask me how I'm doing.  I promise to be honest, if you'll promise to hold me accountable.  With our new baby girl, the boys being at an impressionable age, and my wife working so hard to hold us all together, I need to step up as a dad, husband, and spiritual leader.  And when I do step up, it will benefit my family, my ministry, and everyone I know.

I thank God for my wife who has never let this conversation go and fights for our family as hard as she does.  Every day I'm growing and learning.  She is one of my best teachers and right behind her are my children.  God is good...all the time.