
When ministers are stranded they need a consistent presence to help them through the darkness. It's not fair to the minister's family for his spouse, children, parents, or siblings to be that only consistent presence. Sure, you will require the support of family as you live out ministry. However, you should never burden your spouse with being the only ear you bend in times of crisis. Your spouse may have agreed to your job and supports your job, but unless they are being paid by the church too; it's not their job. Above that they are trying to worship where you work and build relationships with those you are shepherding. Give your family your concerns, your victories, your seasons of doubt and dismay, but don't pin them down as your counselor and punching bag for when things are sour.
A minister needs someone who will appreciate them for who they are, give them a long line of grace, and not be willing to leave them there. "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity." -Proverbs 17:17 "A Friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you anyway." -Elbert Hubbard
Ministers need friends too.
I wish I could tell you who to befriend, but I don't think that's fair. In fact, I started to share a list of who not to choose and realized I was breaking all those rules and my friendships are working and helpful.
The important thing is not to do life alone. When things go crazy you will need someone to talk with about what is happening. Choose someone trustworthy that you have established a relationship with and lean on them.
In Castaway, Tom Hanks has no one and relies completely on a volleyball that has a blood print for a face. He uses a volleyball, Wilson, to confide in and have conversations with as he is stranded. When we end up on the island as I have shared before, we must find our, "Wilson", and lean on them. If they prove faithful they will help direct and restore us. It may not fix the problem, but any time there is a problem, the best solution is to have someone to share the burden.
If you are a minister moving to a new place. If you are a minister who operates alone. If you are a minister that finds themselves lacking connections. Make finding your "Wilson" your first order of business. When you first arrive you probably won't need them. A time will come when you will and you will be glad that you found them first.